Mixed Up With Me

Sallie (02:15.266)
Hello and welcome to Twin Study After Dark. I’m your host Sallie. And I’m your other host Katie. Okay, so this is a special podcast today because T-Swift just dropped an album. Two albums actually, which was so exciting. I don’t know about you, but I set my alarm for midnight. No, I did not do that. I did and I woke up and I listened to the first one and I went back to bed. And so when I woke up in the morning to go to work.

I was shocked when I found out there was another one. Yeah, I was like, oh crap. Okay, so I woke up and I just saw all of them because I think like the album that’s black has all of them. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, that was, I mean, all day I’ve been listening to it. I honestly have been like a range of emotions today. I ran into work and I was like, who is this Swifty? I need to talk to somebody now. See, I feel like the online presence of it is underwhelming right now. I…

I think honestly I feel that it’s just so much to take in that everybody is processing. Yeah. And then we’ll hear a lot more after everybody has processed it. That’s why I felt like we had to make a podcast about it first of all because it’s just mastery. But second of all, I don’t think anyone’s gonna actually have time to listen to a podcast for like at least, at least a week.

No, I should be listening to the albums to be honest. And honestly, we’re wasting our time because we should be listening to them further. Yeah, but we wanted to do like our initial reaction. Okay, because I think for both of us, we’ve discussed this in the past. We will have initial songs that we just automatically love and then it takes some time and then we find new loves and new songs that we’re obsessed with.

So as you keep listening. I wanted to get that initial reaction out there. And like we’ll probably list our favorite songs today, but in a week there will be like new ones that will be like, oh my gosh, because sometimes I feel like for whatever reason some songs take a while to grow on you. Like also it depends what mood you’re into. I mean, I was just everything today. So okay, so we don’t have a debate topic. This is a special edition. If you’re looking for…

Sallie (04:31.126)
What song should I listen to if you’re not a Taylor Swift fan? Because even my husband, I sent him a couple songs and he was like, this is art, this is poetry. Like he was very impressed. It’s so good. It is so, we are so lucky to have her. I can’t stress that enough. I was thinking, I’m sure they have this somewhere, but you need, she needs to make like a poetry book that you can put on a coffee table of just her songs. Don’t! Do not.

Let’s say that Taylor Swift’s lyrics equate to a coffee table book. Um, okay, well I… Like a museum? Yes. Okay, museum? I’m just saying… Maybe. If they were on a coffee table in a coffee house and it was just her poetry, which is her songs, everybody would be reading them and thinking it was great. It’s so good. Yeah.

That wasn’t a diss. That was like just everyone needs to get their hands on this somehow I’m sure because some people don’t listen to quote up, you know, Taylor Swift I’m sure if there was money in it, it would be it would exist I’m sure it does exist or maybe we just don’t know also to disclaimer We’re not gonna claim we we’ve we are Swifties But we’re not gonna claim to know anything about her more than we actually know So if we say something you’re like, no, that’s not right. Don’t come for us. We’re just like

We’re just speaking on behalf of our own feelings. Yeah. So just putting that out there, we don’t claim to be correct on any of the things we’re about to say. Yeah. Also, we’re just relating them to ourselves, as you will when you listen. We’re just feeling the feels. All day, all I wanted to do, and I might be working tonight, so this might not be an option, was to lay in bed with like a glass of wine and the dark and just like vibe on her music. Yeah.

Isn’t that the feel of the album? For me, that’s the feel of the album. I feel like the feel of the album, she did a really good job at making something that was both sad, full of rage, but also nostalgic and kind of bittersweet sounding. Also I don’t know if this is just because we’ve gone to the concert before, but there were some songs that I was like, this would be bomb if there was a ton of people singing

Sallie (06:49.246)
Like, yeah, I wanna sing this. Or shout it at the top of your lungs. Yes, totally. So I feel like this album was the first one I actually, and maybe because when you go to her concert, she’ll say, when I wrote this, I really imagined people singing along the bridge or something. Right. But there were a couple songs that I was just like, damn, this will be good live. Totally. So anyway, what I made Kitty do today, which is hard, it’s hard to do. Did you make me do it? Because I also really wanted to do it. Well, I said I wanted you to rank your favorites.

So we’re just gonna share our number ones and see if they align. But I actually, but we, I don’t think I have a number one so I can say. This is first initial reaction. No one’s gonna come for you if it’s a stupid song. All of them are good. Okay, there were two songs. I said one, number one. I know, I just wanna put this out there. See, this is already not working. There were two songs that I felt like upon the first listen stood out to me. Okay, but can you pick one?

Just one. You go first. I don’t know if I can pick one. Okay. So my standout, number one, when I listened through and I was like, this is a song everyone’s gonna love. Yeah. Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me. That was one of my first two as well. Yeah, yeah. I mean, okay, so I wrote down some of the lyrics and I also noted next to it, I just put power. Like I was just like, this is power. I.

I want to say I wrote down a lot of lyrics for the songs we’re about to address as well. So Sallie and I are really into lyrics and I think everybody is when they’re listening to music and they want to relate to music. That’s like the power and the whole Taylor Swift has over all of us is she can write something that everybody has experienced or can relate to their personal life. And even if she’s going through X, Y, and Z and hers, there is the mystery and the lure of wondering like what is this person going through? Who is this about?

But the true connection she has with fans is that everybody can in some way relate to what she writes because she’s a fucking genius. I just think it’s good writing. I think this happens in books, this happens in songs, but wait, poetry, but when you can write something that’s so beautifully written, everyone is like, oh my God, that’s amazing. I don’t know, you just hit different. So it process. Yeah. Okay. So the first lyric that I noticed that I really liked was.

Sallie (09:09.574)
The scandal was contained the bullet just grazed at all costs keep your good name You don’t get to tell me you feel bad. So that was the first lyric and what I felt kind of With this lyric as well as the next one. I’m about to say What I was feeling when I read this or listen to this song what is kind of like

It felt like to me, and granted I’m seeing it through my eyes, potentially she was in like a narcissistic group situation. That’s what it felt like to me. Okay. And they were like trying to keep a perfect name and the scandal was contained trying to keep things under wraps and basically they underestimated her. I feel like. Because she’s saying who’s afraid of little old me. And then the next lyric I wrote down was, I was tamed.

I was gentle until the circus like made me mean. Don’t you worry folks, we took out her teeth. Who’s afraid of little old me? Well, you should be. To me, I felt like she was in a group or like she talks about a house or the circus. Like she was in a part of something that was really damaging and horrible and potentially full of like narcissistic people, people that underestimated her, maybe did some shady things, but where they were sheep in wolf’s clothing.

And she’s coming back and saying, who’s afraid of little old me? Well, you should be. That’s so interesting because I did not put it in that perspective at all. Really? Yeah, no, that’s so crazy. This is what we love about Taylor Swift. That’s crazy. Because you can relate it to your life. In my perspective, I thought this was about a partner that did her dirty and was shady. And then the circus was like her going on tour. And like, I’m like, and that’s what like.

Who’s afraid of little me? She has this platform. It’s this big outward thing that she has to, you know, I don’t know, expose whatever could have happened. And it’s like this kind of threat. But like- Yeah, it did seem like a threat. It was- I think it did feel like a threat. But I do think it, to me, I felt like it had a lot of underlining. It felt like they underestimated her. Like she can’t do anything. She won’t do anything. Yeah. And she’s like-

Sallie (11:31.034)
You should be scared. I wrote down the lyrics from that song that said, you caged me and then you called me crazy. I am what I am because you trained me. So who’s afraid of me? Who’s afraid of little old me? Yeah. I fucking love that. Yeah. Like they…

And you think about narcissistic parents, who trained me to be this way? I know. I don’t think it’s about her parents because she loves her parents. No, I’m not saying, this has nothing to do with kind of sex. Yes, yes, yes. I’m just saying how this could relate to so many different people, or if you’re in, like you said, a group setting, if you’ve been in the same group for a long time, and I would imagine the life of a celebrity can be very toxic, who trained me to be this way? How many people had this impact on me?

And like, you should be afraid. Yeah. I also, yeah, I just really related to it. I can say personally, like, I’ve been in groups where I feel like they all wanna uphold this perfect, pristine image, and you’re never gonna cut it, and it’s like you’re always damaging them in some way, but they’re always like not really being truthful about their own things. And once you walk away,

They think she can’t do any harm. It’s her word against us. We’re a group, right? We’re a big group. You can’t do anything. And then it’s just like, who’s afraid of little me? Well, you should be. And it’s like, because you didn’t take away my voice. Right. Like I can still tell my side of it. Yeah. So I, that blew my mind. Yeah. This morning I was like, I mean, that song was a masterpiece. What was your number two? So originally I’m…

Like I said, this is very hard for me because I don’t feel like I can rank these songs. I’m trying to go back through my notes because I’m like… Well just write or just say one that you liked next. I know. Because they’re gonna change. It’s gonna change for sure. Okay, so I can do it with a broken heart. Katie didn’t turn off her phone again. I did turn off my phone. Wait, but I didn’t disconnect. They didn’t… Look, it didn’t disconnect me. It blinked. Oh.

Sallie (13:43.866)
Okay, sorry. This podcast every single week. I’m sorry. Someday we’re gonna learn. Okay, sorry everybody. I thought I did turn off my phone on sleep but I don’t… Oh, you know why? Because you don’t have that person on sleep. I have my phone on sleep mode but I do allow my son’s father’s phone calls to come through just in case. So all in all he was calling. Okay, so the next song…

The next song, I can do it with a broken heart. Oh, that was mine! Okay, so that was another, again, initial reaction where I was like, oh, this is a good song. Yeah, fans are gonna love it. It’s just, it’s really, it’s a bop. Like I said, it’s power again. And then I said jam, like jam exclamation point. It was such a jam. I okay, so.

I love the line, I’m so depressed I act like it’s my birthday every day. I wrote that one down too. It’s okay so who hasn’t been in that kind of mode? So this song to me was the song when you’re just out of a relationship and you’re assuming what your ex must think of you from what they’re seeing on the outside. And they’re like she looks so happy. And it’s or like they’re like she’s really struggling because she’s like

doing okay. Or she’s posting all the time and she’s always smiling or she’s dressed up in… I think she says something about like dressing in sequins or something. But it’s like I’m so depressed I act like it’s my birthday and I just think that’s so cool because everybody’s been there. Everyone’s been there. You know where it’s like you are self-medicating by keeping yourself busy and doing as much as possible.

to just stay afloat because you are the saddest you’ve ever been. And to the outside world, it looks like you’re having the time of your life and you got it all together. I think though too, like again, we had gone to the concert and after we went to Taylor Swift’s concert, Yeah. It was right after news broke that her and Jo had broken up, which obviously happened way longer Right. You know, back than we even knew. Because we have to get into like who she’s even talking about in these songs. But, um…

Sallie (16:01.31)
like me and Katie at the concert were like, wow, she seems so great and like happy. And how does she do it? How does she do it? And like, it was clear that this was such a profession. Like it was, I don’t want to say an act, but it was so clear that it was a performance. And it was like, and it was like, you got to turn it on. It’s time to turn it on and not to like step on what you’re saying or like cut you off. But I love this song because I felt like when I was,

in my lowest point, I did the same thing where it was like, I was making the best designs I ever created. Oh yeah. You know, like it was like, you just have to find that something and come back from it. So it’s like, I’m putting everything into this now and it creates this massive amount of success for you. Yeah. But like you can only do that propelled by such sadness. Yeah. So I wrote down the line as well. This is a long one. Okay. But it’s basically like the main…

part of the song, but I’m a real tough kid. I can handle my shit. They said, baby, fake it till you make it. And I did. Lights, camera, bitch, smile, even when you wanna die. I loved that too because it sounds dramatic to say you wanna die, but honestly, after some breakups, you feel like that.

You feel like you just don’t want to get out of bed. Exactly. What’s the point anymore? Exactly. But I love the lights, camera, bitch smile, because it’s almost being hard on yourself, too. It’s a pep talk to yourself. Put it on. Bitch, get it together. We got to keep going. And I feel like everybody’s had at least, I work in hospitality. But even when I was a teacher, it’s true, too.

You don’t want to show the days that you’re really sad and dragging. So I will literally say to myself, like as I’m driving my car to work, like, Sallie, like, fake it till you make it. Like, put on a smile. Put on the show. You know what I mean? Oh my god. You have to put that on sometimes. And I just love, like, even though she’s Taylor Swift and she’s clearly talking about her tour, everyone can relate in some regard. Because everyone turns it on sometimes. Sometimes you just need to turn it on. Yeah, I mean, I’m not kidding. I have turned…

Sallie (18:14.718)
Meg the stallion on in the morning on the way to work so many times and it’s redonkey-less but like that’s what’s gonna get me through the morning. Yeah. That and a diet coke let’s be real. Yeah okay so number three what was your three number three? Um this is so hard okay so I have to make a shout out to So Long London. Oh and that wasn’t on my list. Okay uh but I also do you want

Sallie (18:44.926)
So it’s a number five track, which is always one of Taylor Swift’s most vulnerable tracks. So I was very aware that I wanted to listen to it. I do think, I think this one’s about Joe. I’m not positive, again, that these come for me because I do think there’s a lot about Matt Healy on this album. I know. That’s what shook me. I was not expecting that at all. Me neither. But my last two songs on my list were, I think, Matt Healy songs.

I just, it’s crazy to me because I really think, I mean we talked about this earlier, like Midnights was obviously a Jo break up album. This album was so heavily focused I feel like on Maddie Healy. Yeah. Which, that was shocking. Yeah it was. So I was gonna read the lyrics real quick that I wrote down. So how much sad did you think I had? Did you think I had in me? How much tragedy? Just how long?

did you think I’d go for I’d self before I self implode for I’d have to go be free. And then I wrote down there. I mean, there’s so many like it was just like one of those. Okay, so I’ll continue. But the other lyrics I wrote down from the song were and I’m pissed off. You let me give you all that youth for free. Like giving her youth away. That has to be Joe because it’s six years.

and it says, I’m just mad as hell because I love this place for so long, London. And I thought that, I mean, but supposedly she was with Maddie Healy for a long enough for 10 years. Right, and it doesn’t matter, like in the grand scheme of why I love this song, it doesn’t really have to do with either or whoever she’s talking about. But I think there’s something so true about a relationship that you devote your youth to, especially your 20s, but like,

in general, a period of time. And it’s like, I love the lyrics, so how much sad did you think I had? And so like when you devote years of your life to somebody and so much is sadness, how long do you expect somebody to sit in that? Yeah. And I think that’s just like a good, like I felt for that, I related to that. That was a beautiful lyric. I related to it, yeah. So my number three was the manuscript. Oh, you know what? I feel like that’s on your own man.

Sallie (21:06.762)
Honorable mention for me. Okay, to me I felt as though it was relatable because This is how I interpreted the song Yeah So the lyric the first lyric goes he said if the sex was half as good as the conversation Soon, they’d be pushing strollers, but soon it was over Yeah, and then it talks about how she wished she was 30. So she wished she was older They’d have coffee and a French press in the morning

After they broke up, she’d eat kid cereal and sleep in her mother’s bed. And to me, it was a relationship with an older man. This honestly felt like Jake Gyllenhaal to me. But because I felt like an older man to me. I need to re-listen to it because I thought that she was going through blips of time in her life.

Oh, interesting. So I need to go back and listen to it. Okay. I don’t think I can contribute much. I think that’s the thing is like you take a song and you try to tie it into your life. Yeah. And that reminds me of my relationship with an older man. Yeah. And then it also said, and I liked this one, looking backwards may be the only way to move forward. Like you need to deal with it. You need to look backwards. You need to like process it. Yeah. As an adult.

too, especially when you’re in a relationship with an older man. Even my relationship with an older man, I look back at it now, my age now, and that was eight years ago when I dated him, or nine years ago, I don’t even know. He was my age at the time. And I look at who I am now, I’m like, I have four kids, I’m 35, and I’m like, he was that when he met me when I was 20 something. Yeah.

You know, like, so I think that that’s interesting, but you do look back as an adult and then it says, now and then I reread the manuscript, but the story isn’t mine anymore. And I think that’s beautiful because you change. It’s not your story anymore. That was the story of the little girl you were back then. I see, but I feel like when she says that, she’s saying now it’s my fan story. Like it’s not mine, I’m giving it to you. Like, I could see that. Yeah, I like that. Because I’m giving, I’m releasing it. And like…

Sallie (23:14.066)
man, have we talked about the power of release, but like, this is her release. I love that. That’s true, yeah. I know, and like I said, I think a lot of the songs personally for me, and I know you do too, you relate them to your own life. Like you hear them and you’re like, this is beautiful, but I bet you if you got 10 people in a room, they’d all relate to it differently. They’d all think differently. And I just talked to- I think that’s why they’re so good. That’s why they’re so good. And I just talked to a coworker this morning and she was saying, oh, you know, she’s a big Swiftie.

And she was saying, you know, it’s so hard sometimes to listen to music. And I might’ve like said kind of the similar, like got her on this path, but she’s like, if you’re not relating to it, you have to like, Listen to it for a while to get the feel for it. You know? And I was like, hi, we’re lucky because we were lucky.

We’re Taylor Swift’s age, so we literally grew up, when she was a teenager, we were the same age, and everything she was singing about, we’ve always related to, because we’ve been on kind of like that same path. But the coolest thing is that she has bridged this generational gap that is so fucking impressive, that there are people, there are moms and there are children listening to it now. Oh yeah, like kids are singing these songs. I also wanna say too, shoot, I lost my train of thought.

Oh, I wanna say too, like right now, we’re both happy and committed relationships. Yeah. And so listening to these songs, I’m not really relating in terms of my life now, and I’ve seen so many funny memes of married women being like, okay, bring back my trauma from 10 years ago. It does. But it does. It is like therapy, because it’s all this stuff I feel like I…

haven’t quite handled and it like kind of brings it back up and you’re like oh shit I guess I need to like it makes you reprocess things yeah and maybe that’s why we reach out to our exes I don’t reach out to my exes I know that a long time we said me neither but we said we were never gonna do that but like songs like this it makes you really think about like totally because this like none of these songs make me think of Adam because they’re all kind of heartbreaking you know the first pass I did in listening to the album

Sallie (25:33.298)
I was like, this is so, I love the sadness. I love the rage, but it was hard for me to relate because I feel like I have a really good partner right now. And, but there was like, kind of like a silver lining in like the realization I, wait, I have a really good partner right now. No, I, and it never feel the silver lining when I listen to her. I just slip back into a dark, dark hole and I’m like,

This is so sad and I’m so like, I feel sad too. I feel very sad too, but I feel like there’s times where I listen to her music and in this case there, and I don’t want to like say much about the next album cause it was a double album because I didn’t write down any of the double album songs, but there is, I don’t know if I have a couple of songs potentially about her beef with Kim Kardashian and, and it was for me.

I personally have been bullied in my life and it’s, I’ve pushed it down so far that I don’t ever want to bring it up. And when she writes about it, there’s, there’s just knee-jerk reaction to say, move on, like stop bringing it up. Like because I personally don’t want to deal with my own shit that the fact that she’s writing about it still and how much it impacts her. It, it really like.

scratches at the surface of a wound that I have not come to terms with and And like I thought that was interesting today because I just I had to skip over it I was like, I’m not I don’t want to hear about it Oh see I yeah, I feel like I’m at a good place to listen to it all it definitely brings up things in me but like I feel like the past year I’ve been on a journey of like acknowledging those uneasy feelings and like honestly, just remembering these really terrible uncomfortable things that happened or

people that you experienced in your life, like that’s part of life. And like I’m trying to like acknowledge it all because I feel like you become a shell of a human if you don’t. Yeah. And that’s also what, again, people connect to, like you’ve been bullied too. And it’s like the shame around admitting that. You know, like you feel so much shame around it. That’s why you don’t want to talk about it. It’s embarrassing to like kind of talk about.

Sallie (27:50.922)
But that’s the thing is that I like about her music or anybody who’s bluntly honest about experiences because somebody needs to hear that and somebody needs to strengthen themselves to talk about it openly because you shouldn’t feel shame about that. You know what I mean? Like you should feel shame if you bullied others but you shouldn’t feel shame about being bullied. I was thinking about too like how Taylor Swift in her lyrics a lot oftentimes talks about

being over dramatic or wanting to die or whatever. And I just think about how many times she must have been told she’s being over dramatic. And I mean, this has been a journey today. Like we said, no, I’ve processed so many things that I know all my thoughts are coming out discombobulated. But I was thinking about how we had talked about.

looking at yourself in the mirror and saying three things you love about yourself. And then I was thinking how it’s so easy, and I don’t want to make this blanket statement, but in my perspective, it’s so easy for women to look at men and look at them and be like, I love this about them, I love this about them, I love this about them. And if we could only just do that for ourselves, because I feel like I would get so many men and I’ll like say like, I love that about them or I love that about them. And it’s like I

build this idea up in my mind about how wonderful they are because I’m doing the three things about them every day. And it’s like, turn that love back around on yourself. Yeah. You know? And a lot of her album I think is like still discovering how to do that. So my next song, I had two honestly. And this might be on the second album. I don’t know because I just listened to all the songs. But Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus.

Did you listen to that song? I did, but I haven’t gotten too far into it. This song was gut wrenching. Yeah? Yes. It was honestly the most tragic song I felt on the album. It had me like, I was like- Is that the one that mentions the location? Am I making this up? No, that’s the black dog. Okay, okay. See, I need to get further into this. Also, we’re gonna have a debate about sharing your location because I’m a firm believer in it. Katie’s not. I don’t like to be tracked. Okay, anywho.

Sallie (30:07.938)
Who shares their fucking location with T-Swift and forgets they shared it? Seriously. Tell me that’s not intentional. That has to be intentional. It’s Taylor fucking Swift. Like seriously. Like what? But anyway, listen to the Black Dog. You’ll be very confused. So Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus. So oh my god, so this song was beautiful. Beautiful. But it says, if you want to break my cold colored heart.

Just say I loved you the way that you were. If you want to tear my world apart, just say you’ve always wondered. Who hasn’t wanted their ex, or a person that you longed for to come to you and say those words? Just to like have that closure, validation. Like also though, once you’ve moved on, if somebody came to you and said those words, that would break you. Yeah. There’s nothing more that could break you.

But then she said, I changed into goddesses, villains, and fools, changed plans and lovers and outfits rules, all to outrun my desertion of you. And you just watched it. Like she was doing all of these things to get his attention to make him come back and say something. Yeah. And he just watched it. And he never said like, you’ve always made me wonder. Or like, you know, I liked you the way you were. And she wanted that. She wanted someone to chase her.

I’ve definitely been there. Yeah, totally. I just feel like we need to have guy friends. We can’t stress this enough because I have a man coming on our podcast. The depths in the soul that a woman goes to for love. Do men feel all these feelings? No, I don’t think so. I need to know this. I need to know. But there are men that write poems. I don’t know. I’ve talked about it.

Are the artistic men writing poems just the little bitches? Because I’ve dated- What do you mean by that? This is so frowned upon to say this. I’ve dated a lot of men that were- Nobody wrote you poems. I know. But like, painted paintings or wrote songs about me. Oh really, you had that? Yeah. Oh. That’s a good- Because remember we said people write me poems, but not you.

Sallie (32:29.602)
Do you remember? But my poetry, the man who also told me he was dying? Oh yeah, okay. Okay, well anywho. So let’s change that subject. I’m just gonna change it right now, but I’m just saying like, if they feel feelings, it can go to extremes, where they also pretend they have illnesses they don’t have. We’re getting off track. Okay, we’re getting off track. Okay, so the next one. These people are crazy. Okay, so we’re drinking wine.

Because we can’t recap without feeling our feels. Okay, so the next one I wrote down was, My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys. I didn’t write that one down. But I think it’s a cute title. Yeah, I think it’s really cute. So the lyrics I wrote down from that are, I’m queen of sand castles he destroys, cause I knew too much there was a danger in the heat of my touch. He saw forever so he smashed it up.

my boy only breaks his favorite toys. Oh, that’s so sad. I think that there are, I don’t know if anybody’s ever seen the interview with Megan Fox where she, I think it was under the Drew Barrymore Show, but can’t quote that, but she wrote a book and she talks about how- And it’s a poetry book. Yeah, it is a poetry book. So go read that. But I felt like her interview was really-

good because she talked about how you can believe in somebody so much and if they have not healed their childhood trauma, there’s nothing you can do and you have to like release that or let go of them. But I just felt like that song specifically was about the guy who things get too good or he sees a future and he just has to leave or he destroys it himself. Like self-sabotage. He self-sabotages. Yeah. And I think…

Most women have experienced that in the dating world. Is like, you’ll get… I don’t think most women have. Okay, I’ve definitely experienced that. Okay. I think I sabotage things. I’ve never been with a guy who self-sabotages, I don’t think. Do you know who I’m talking about? No.

Sallie (34:39.05)
Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah, she has been with one like that. Yeah, so I was stomping on her sand castle So my next one I had this was a bop. This was a jam. Okay down bad Okay, see I liked it. I like all the songs But what this one was like a jam was one I could like um Fuck it if I can’t have him I might just die would make

It would make no difference. Sallie likes all the songs that she mentions just dying. I might just not get up, stay down. I love your hostile takeovers, how dare you think it’s romantic, leaving me safe and stranded. Fuck it, I was in love, fuck it if I can’t have us. I think I like it because I can be that dramatic. Oh my god, it’s you to a T. Literally like- I’ve heard Sallie say these words. Like-

I’m literally just gonna die. This is Sallie with her college boyfriend. Oh no! I literally, Katie, everyone needs to see, I wrote college. I literally wrote college memories. Like, fuck it if I can’t have him. I literally would be like, I might just die, that makes no difference. If I can’t have him.

No, I love it because she even says something about adolescence or something, like acting like a child basically. Yeah. And I related to it so hard. I was like, this, A, everyone’s… Think of teenagers that listen to this song. Oh yeah. That’s how they feel. That’s how she’s staying relevant. It’s like everybody’s still going through the same shit. But it’s like the day after or the week after a breakup, before you kind of get your head back on straight, I have had days where I’m like…

Well, fuck it. What am I even doing this for? Like, why am I even alive? It’s always like the sadness and then the anger. Yeah. And I love when you get to the anger phase. Yeah. Because that’s when you get in with the Matt Healy. Because I think it goes like me crying at the gym. Like, oh yeah, totally. Fuck it if I can’t have him. I was like, girl, that’s a jam. Like, I can imagine people shouting it in a concert. Totally. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I loved that one. And then I go to my Honorable Mention.

Sallie (36:56.271)
Which again, I probably missed some because I was I was re-listening to the ones I really liked at first And I need to like go back. Did you write down the smallest man who ever lived? No, but I get why you like it Yeah Why do you think I like it? Once you this is funny once Katie told me size doesn’t matter When he was the smallest man

that ever lived. Um, okay. No, it wasn’t that. Hilarious. But that was the same guy. Oh, that I would relate this to? Yeah, I think so. I don’t know. I mean, okay, so there’s so much here because I do think that everybody has, like, could I get more personal? Like, is it possible? I mean, she just bared her heart and soul. I know. So when I, so, um.

I was married. Katie, you say that every episode. I know, every episode. Because it’s like… Katie was divorced. We don’t know. It was so much long. It was such a long period of my life. But then… That’s why we all know about it and you don’t need to keep saying that. Yeah, okay. So, but I don’t know. Maybe there’s new listeners. So, but then after that, it’s… I feel like my marriage was the Joe relationship. If I were to really relate my life to your sex… Yeah, like it was like a slow breakup. It was like a slow, like…

Ripping at the ceiling like I was like just it was falling apart very slowly clearly like over But like once it was over you were once it was over We were both relieved or like oh, thank God. We’re not being tortured anymore Yeah It was just like a huge relief like you should not leave a relationship and like the day after be like Why do I feel so relieved? That’s a good sign you weren’t meant to be in that relationship or hanging out with those people right exactly so then

But then after my marriage, I dated somebody that was… The smallest man in the world. The smallest man that ever lived, to be honest. In more than one way. He was just like, I think a twin flame that was like, oh she has one song on here about taking her out, and maybe it’s this one, I’m not sure, how he liked to show her off. And I was like, I just feel like this person was more into the idea.

Sallie (39:10.506)
of me than actually me. But anyway this was a short relationship and you were gutted. I mourned this relationship more than I mourned my marriage. Like that is the wildest fucked up thing to say. You mourned the relationship longer than the relationship was. Yeah totally yeah because I think it was the ideal of it. Yeah I don’t even think and like he liked the idea of me I think I like the idea of somebody even liking me because the marriage

was just so done for so many years. There was nothing left there. But this was like excitement. And I think I can only imagine that’s how Taylor Swift felt about Matt Healy. Yeah, like he was the guy that like kind of brought life back into her. But then like left pretty briefly or like right up. It was like once it became real, it was not for him. I honestly was like shocked that every single song seemed like it was about him. I know, me too. So anyway, so the smallest man who ever lived.

The lyrics I wrote down, you hung me on your wall, stabbed me with your pushpins, in public showed me off, then sank in stoned oblivion. Also, the guy who I dated was always stoned. Like, I didn’t realize that when I got together with him, but he was always stoned, also a very- Sorry, mate. Like, I was irritated by it all the time. Because who needs to be stoned to go to Disney? Like, it’s Disney. Oh, that sucks. Like, you can be sober for that shit.

And also, okay, so also I wrote down you didn’t measure up in any measure of a man. I Love that. Yeah, that’s powerful. That’s powerful. Okay, so then I’m sorry my contact is really bugging me. Sorry No, I’m just I feel bad for the viewers because I’m like Touching my eye all the time. So Enid is rubbing up against her So then the last thing I wrote down was pretty long But it says you’ll confess what you did and I’ll say good riddance cuz it wasn’t sex

Because it wasn’t sexy once, it wasn’t forbidden. What? Oh, like he only liked it when it was forbidden. Yeah. When it wasn’t a thing. She has another lyric about like how a guy like stole her from her boyfriend basically and then released her. You know what I mean? Yeah. So he probably like, it was sexy what it was like, secret. It was totally. And it says, I’ll forget you, but I will never forgive the smallest man who ever lived. Yeah, that’s big.

Sallie (41:31.786)
So my honorable mentions were the prophecy. Again, that was a song that wrecked me. And then thank you, Amy. That was a big one because obviously it’s about Kim Kardashian. Which I have, I feel joy watching the Kardashians on TV. It’s embarrassing to admit, but I do. I also find joy watching Jersey Shore. So I’m not gonna point fingers at what to. I find joy from them. I think they’re hilarious, but like.

The thank you Amy, it just was about a bully. Like Katie said, she couldn’t barely even listen to it. I’m not ready. But she had a line where she was like, my mom is like a saint, basically. I forget the verbiage, but she wants you dead. And I just think of like a mother’s like love and protection towards you. Like watching you go through all this crap because some girl is just being nasty. Like that is such a, like it’s not a…

It’s not fun, or it’s not like, gonna get anyone to like you by admitting your mom wants this lady dead. Right. But it’s so bluntly honest, and I think it’s, A, a testament to being a parent, but B, how much she does not fucking care what people think really by putting this out there. Yeah. Like, this girl hurt her that much that her mom was like, I want this lady dead. Yeah. And…

Honestly, if you’re a parent, you probably know the feeling, you know? Like, I haven’t experienced bullying with my children yet, but if somebody messed with my kid to the point where they were, like, suicidal, like, that’s not a good feeling to have. Yeah. Um, so, obviously I had to do a shout out to Florence and the Machine. I can’t even, because that is… I’ve…

I want to see Florence so bad in concert. Katie’s so upset she hasn’t. I’m so butthurt over this because I have never seen her, but Sallie got to see her in concert. And she was freaking phenomenal. And when Taylor Swift did her concert, I was like, I was so impressed by Taylor Swift, but I was like, Katie, if you’re impressed by Taylor Swift, you need to watch Florence and the Machine perform. Because Taylor Swift choreographs everything, dancing and singing the whole time, which for three hours is…

Sallie (43:49.562)
Absolutely, I don’t know how she does it. Honestly, I don’t. Florence in the Machine, I watched her sprint up and down aisles while belting out songs, like sprinting, full sprinting. And I was just like, what? Like, how is she doing it? And then when I saw she was on the album, I was like, Katie, you’re never going to get to go to her concert. Now she’s going to be too big. Everybody she collaborated with for this, we’re rock. Like, the perfect match. The best of the best. The best of the best, which, of course, is Taylor Swift. Why not? Yeah.

The Tortured Poets Department, I liked it. I feel like the first three songs of the album felt really 80s vibe to me. And it was funny because I’ve really been listening to 80s songs lately. I don’t know why, but I liked how boppy they were. Yeah, I think that, what was the other one? But Daddy I Love Him. Oh, okay. I did like that and I’d be curious. I wanna hear what other people thought that was about because I got a different read than somebody else I talked to about it, but I did enjoy the song. Okay. Yeah, so I’d be curious.

With that, we’d love to hear what everybody else thinks. What was your favorite song? We’re still very much processing this and sorry if this was not planned because it absolutely was not. No, it wasn’t planned because it wasn’t. We literally were like, we need to discuss all of these songs. The lyrics, I mean, I’m blown away. She is just a poet and clearly very, very skilled artist.

in all regards. But I just I can’t believe how she constantly reinvents herself and I said on our Instagram like I’m not one to be blown away by any artist. I can appreciate that she’s very talented but this album really these two albums blew me away. I just I was blown away. Like I don’t know why anybody would be fighting saying they kind of

Like the people that fight and say like, oh, she’s not talented or they can’t acknowledge her as an artist or say they don’t like her. I’m like, why, why do you fight it so hard? Like just acknowledge that she has talent and she has done more than any other artist at this point. I don’t even honestly though, like even as an artist, I’m she’s amazing. She’s fricking obviously the best. But.

Sallie (46:13.51)
I acknowledge her as a freaking human being. Like she’s burying her soul. She’s vulnerable and telling things that are like not the best qualities of herself. And she’s a business woman because somehow she knows what people are gonna connect to enough to make money off of it. Yeah. So like power to her. Power to her, yeah. Because that is fucking impressive. This is a living tale and lesson to just continue to show up as yourself. Yeah.

Honestly, yeah, I feel like that’s what she does and Yeah, she would probably brainstorms a little bit about like businesses and how to like appear to others, but Honestly, she’s letting a lot Be honestly out there. Yeah, and as she has said if she was a man she would be the man Well, I mean she’s the woman so that’s even strong. I know and I wish like because remember we had this conversation. Yeah

where sometimes in the past I’ve been like, I’m doing it all, I feel like I’m the man. Yeah, and I was like, Katie, you’re the woman. You’re the woman, like, yeah, that’s, you’re the woman. That is a powerful thing. Yeah. Just reframe your mind. Reframe your mind, and to be called a woman is powerful. I think the most powerful thing. The most powerful, let’s be, yeah. Let’s get it. Sorry, Ben, I don’t mean to be a man hater. Yeah. I do value anything a man brings to a conversation, but I think that…

being a woman is freaking powerful, so like, that’s what I should inspire for. Yeah. So that’s that. And that’s that. We are going to wrap up, and if we have comments, or if you guys wanna hear more, we will do more, but this was our first.

Reaction and now we’re just gonna go listen to the album on repeat for the next 48 hours at least if for I mean the next few months. I’m excited to have a new identity. Yeah, Katie’s like I’m gonna live through this I know do you think what era do you think that this is like is this a villain era? Is this a like no, what is this? I’m actually looking forward to her next album because I think it’s gonna be really upbeat Oh, yeah, and I typically only like her sad albums

Sallie (48:25.942)
But now that I’m in a happy state in my life, but I’m happy right now. For the first time in a very long time, I’m very excited for the happy album. Yeah. But madly impressed by this one. Yeah. Do you think that this one topped all the rest of the albums or can you even compare? Oh, I think she just gets better and better. Yeah. I think like poetically wise, she gets better and better for sure. Yeah. But like I’m always gonna be a sucker for reputation. I’m a sucker for rep, why has she not released it yet?

Because she’s busy with this. I know I’m going to I mean nobody wants to be around me when that gets re-released because I Really will make that my next personality like I Loved that album, but also I think there’s albums that are just nostalgic because you’re going through something at the time So red is very nostalgic. Oh, yeah, love it. Yeah, but yeah, this one was Guttin I was not okay. I’m still not okay

And if anybody talks to me this weekend, I apologize in advance because I will be bringing up this album. I felt the same way. I’m gonna wrap this up in just two seconds, but I did feel the same way. I think this album is gonna rank very similarly for me as Folklore and Evermore, because those came out during the COVID times. And I remember at the time, I was very invested in them, where I was painting and crying.

and just sitting in this moody feel where I’m like, I’m in this forest, I’m feeling these feelings. And I think that right now, this is that for me at this time. But I do think that like those albums, once you get out of that, I don’t know, sadness, I’m looking forward to the upbeat one next. Like I really can’t wait for it. Yeah, yeah. Beautiful work, T. Yep, good job, we love you. You’re amazing, we love you. Yep.

You keep us livin’. Yeah, it’s really like one of the reasons we live. No. She’s just incredible. She is. Alright, well, thank you guys for listening to our recap. We are going to be dropping a new episode on Monday as well, talking about the full moon and… What are we talking about? I don’t even know. Can you be friends with your ex? Oh, can you be friends with an ex? Yeah.

Sallie (50:47.134)
If you guys want to hear our opinions on that. Not after this conversation. Oh no, I’m gonna like… Because I’m totally dissed. Her album just brought up all the negative feelings about it. All the feels. We’re not gonna be friends. But anyway, that was recorded previously, so hear what we have to say on it. We love you guys and we’ll chat soon. Bye. Okay, do I not want to close it? No.

Sallie (51:17.154)
Man, we had a lot to say on that.